Presently, I’ve always been thinking. So many thoughts and memories cloud my head. Too many memories are buried within my heart and soul, and it feels like I’m trapping them there.

In the outside, I'm working full time on preparing for school, football, and everything outside of school.

But there’s already too much that went on. And too much that’s been going on. The world just wont shut up.

While on the edge of giving up, my mom made me practice piano. I was already so pissed at the world I blandly just practiced, mechanically playing the keys so i could just go to sleep.

Finally its almost time for me to stop and go to sleep.

I play one of my favorite pieces on the piano. While playing, i lose control of everything. All the regrets, pain, disappointment, and anger all flow along with the music while i pound the keys in frustration.

The last note dies away, carrying part of me with it. I sit on the bench, devoid of any emotion.

I listen.



And for once, the world was quiet.

Its always the same thought that enters my mind every time I wake up. It haunts me every waking moment.

I know you wont forgive me.

But thats okay.

Because I dont forgive myself either.

Magnolia, New York

In New York City, away from the large urban buildings, there’s a little small town that appears to be sanctioned off to the side. In that little town, there's a famous bakery called Magnolias.


While we were in New York, my sister wanted to go to Magnolias, to try one of their cupcakes. Her friend told her about Magnolias, therefore, my brother and my sister went on a quest to find this elusive bakery.

On the way there, I saw a large group of kids. The thing that made this group of kids special was that there were all waiting for a bus, and the stop was right in front of a store called , " Condom-o-Mania".

I remember a few of the kids were peering through the windows of the store, and the older ones were laughing and joking to themselves.

A couple blocks later, we finally found Magnolias on the corner of a residential block. We waited as my sister ordered four cupcakes. She finally comes out with a plain paper box.

She opens one and hands one to me. It smells a little like fresh baked heaven. As i bite into it, the frosting just melts in my mouth and the sugary bread does the same. I swallow the sugary mound in ecstasy.

Without another thought, i cram the rest into my mouth, and slowly it.

As i stand, i feel the cupcake just slide down into my stomach, and just sits there. I immediately regret my decision, and i immediately want some milk.

The cupcake just sits like a rock in my stomach. The sugar is so overpowering it doesn’t even make me hyper. Instead, i spend the next three days feeling this lump in my stomach, pretty much like a kidney stone, minus the burning piss and the rocks coming out.

And so it shall be........

Death Cab For Cutie concert tomorrow

Hyped

Blitzkrieg Bop

I dont know if its just me, but ive been pissed off by the immense crapload of work i have been given. Thing is, i havent even realized it until Natasha called me, reminding me that i had 3 book reports due at the end of the month.


But then again, this is all related to the fact that im in English Honors. What makes my point even more hypocritical is that i am the person who filled out the waiver form and turned it in. I knew what i was getting into. I knew that if i turned this is i would be swamped with every possible worksheet there is, but i did it anyways.

Anyways, im just pissed at myself and the school.


As in the words of the Ramones


They're forming in a straight line
They're going through a tight wind
The kids are losing their minds
The Blitzkrieg Bop

They're piling in the back seat
They're generating steam heat
Pulsating to the back beat
The Blitzkrieg Bop.

Back In LA

I learned something in New York.

Cab drivers are the best/craziest drivers out there. Riding a cab in New York is like trying to surf Niagra Falls.

Anyways, Broadway was cool, and i almost got my head crushed by a incoming subway train. I was expecting the train to come in the other way, but instead my brother pulled me back just in time to see a snake of silver steel come rushing right past my face.

Ive escaped death so many times in New York.

The first thing you will learn in New York is that it smells. Its either garbage, smoke, or some other funky shit. But it always smells.

Another thing is that you walk everywhere. Public transporation in key.

Third, its humid. And when its hot and humid, you want to kill yourself. If the hotel rooms werent ACed, id be dead.

Last, there are a lot of White/Asian couples. And i mean assloads. But its always the guy thats white. I never saw the guy being Asian. In fact, i am the only Asian that i know that has ever been with a white girl.

Ok, im done.

Oh yeah, and my fucking ipod broke because it ran out of batteries.

And so it shall be.........